Friday, March 5, 2010

Decoys and Waiting For Summer

Watching a movie on the Space Channel, and I thought it was The Ring, but turns out it's "Decoys"(???). You can tell if a horror movie is going to be crappy, based on what music they open it with. The sign of a bad movie is having some unknown punk band playing. I don't know the logic behind this, but it is true.

So far, we're on a college campus, and the boy from Lassie is the protagonist, Luke. Hanging out in a laundromat, he is accosted by some sexy cousins. One is flaunting her mad rolls of change for the washer, and the other is sucking on one of this horrible lollipops and telling us she has an 'oral fixation'. Har har har.

My brother accurately predicts that these cousins are some kind of fucked up monsters. They seem to be about to reveal themselves, and... there seem to be tentacles coming out of holes in their sternums. And they take turns spraying these tentacles with... liquid nitrogen? Truly, I am in for a hilarious time tonight. Haha, you know who else is in this? The sidekick to Toby from The Listener.

WHOA WHOA WHOA. What just happened? Lassie Boy was going to have sex with a Tentacle Alien so he could expose her tentacle-ness on a hidden camera that he and the girl who's really in love with him planted, and when her sicko tentacles come out and knock a candle over, and then she freaks out when she catches on fire and turns onto a total monster rip-off of Sil from Species before running away. Huh. And the movie is not even over yet.

Oh, and what a crazy twist ending. The cute girl who'd had a crush on Lassie Boy for years is actually a Tentacle Alien too! That was actually really surprising, and made pretty much zero sense with the rest of the movie. Good game, Decoys, but no win for you guys.

Today was such a beautiful day again, and it just makes me want summer all the more. I've never actually looked forward to summer before. I've eagerly awaited spring, and anticipated fall, and wanted winter, but I'm actually excited about summer! It's been so grey for awhile, I want some sun. I'm going to plan lot's of fun outdoorsy things to do.

And that's all I've got for tonight, sadly. I'm strangely exhausted today, and I think my Annual Cold is going to happen soon. I normally only get sick once a year, and it's always around this time. I hope I can fight it this year, because I need more hours for work! Get money, get paid, beetches.

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